No more counterpoint lectures!!!!

Woohoo! I have officially finished my last counterpoint lecture. It is a good day. Not even the rain, the hail, the freezing cold wind, the fact that I have lost my umbrella, and that I didnt wear enough clothes could possibly make my day even remotely bad. For those who dont know (which is nearly everyone) counterpoint lectures are the most boring thing that I have to do, and now it is over. I will sit in silence for a while...


Ok long enough... seriously though, I have been thinking more and more about silence recently. There is something quite special in stilling the mind, to stop doing and just be, to listen. Funnily enough, when I stop to listen, God meets with me. I cannot hear him when I am thinking or doing. It is only when I stop and focus everything I am on Him, that I hear His voice.

Thinking on this now, and stopping to listen, the world we live in is not a silent, quiet place. I listen to the rain as it falls on the roof, and the thunder claps which resonate through the valley, the buzz of my computer box and the gentle tap of the keys as I type... How much do we really miss out on by not stopping to listen? Many people may say that they cannot hear the voice of God speaking to them, but have they ever stopped themselves and waited on Him?

Do you ever stop thinking or doing and simply be?

Humble me

God can be very very humbling at times. I experienced one of the most powerful moments with God that I have ever had. While trying to write music last night we found great difficulty. There was something blocking us from doing what we wanted to do. I'm pretty sure it was God. In our excitement of what he is doing in our team and what we see in the future, we lost sight of what we were there for. To write songs of praise to our Heavenly Father, that he may be glorified. I was changed last night. God has been placing in my heart over recent months a heavy burden. When I am with him and he is working through me, the heavy burden is lifted.

Come to me, all you who are weary and burdened, and I will give you rest. Take my yoke upon you and learn from me, for I am gentle and humble in heart, and you will find rest for your soul. For my yoke is easy and my burden is light. (Matthew 11:28-30)

"Father, may you take my life and let it be one with you. Humble me, so that I may do your work, that your kingdom may be built up. Amen."

This will mean something to some people and absolutely nothing to others. I was going through my pictures and was in stiches for a very long time...ah the memories...

I have a car

Yipeee. My parents finally bought a car for me to drive. (yes, I know its not even mine but I don't care) This means I can actually learn so I dont spend the rest of the year being the only person of my year level that can't drive... I think i've held this title for tooo long... I must say I'm quite glad to be rid of it.

Worship team rocks - that is all i want to say. I simply love getting together with the guys in our team and have a rocking good time. Wish you were playing with us sam... Especially since it keeps getting better and better everytime we get together. Like, last sunday, practice stopped at 6:15 and we actually had a break...how insane is that. Then the next night, our practice went till after 10pm - this never ever ever happens... I love my team & God for being such a wicked member.

I really should be sleeping with an important singing exam tomorrow but can i be stuffed??? no of course not. One of the most distressing things about my busy schedule this week is that I dont have a free night to go and see star wars - sucks to be me. And then I dont have a weekend because of worship retreat (ok so that doesnt suck) but it means everyone that I know will have seen it by the time I am free and I'll have to watch it myself...grrrrrrr poo bum stink and weasel (never quite understood what the weasel had to do with it though...)

Introducing...the nokia 7610....

Oh and I think this is the sexiest phone I have seen so far. I said this to Jess and she thought it was really funny me calling something sexy, but it is....call me crazy if you will. Its definately on my wish list....Ah sleep deprivation.....what good it does for the soul

Vision Banquet

Every year, our church has this event which most people would refer to as the agm - or annual general meeting. Blad de blah blah blah boring buisness stuff. One of the funky things tho, is that the creative ministries budget (ie Woship!) is to be doubled for this year which rocks like anything. Also, we're developing a room off the auditorium into this mean as video editing suite. To my shock, amazment and absolute excitement, when I asked about the possiblity of getting a live feed from the auditorium so we could record music, he was like "sweet as, sounds like a wicked idea, shouldnt be much of a problem." Sweet!!!! Then i asked about software that we need, and he was like "shouldn't be too much of a problem" Man o man is God good or what!!!! Now Tash and I just have to write more songs, we've only done 3 in the last couple of months so had better pick up the pace. Wicked as. No wonder I cant sleep at 1:15 in the morning.....

Springfield were playing tonight at the Copper boiler, if it hadnt been so loud it would have been awesome. Oh well, thats the way it goes then.

blah blah blah friday night blah

Hmmm.

I really wish I was doing something other than writing on my blog. It seems the more time that you spend doing stuff with friends the more time that your by yourself, becomes really crap.

Stupid stupid stupid. I'm really annoyed I'm gonna miss Jono's itemy thing at church this sunday because of a leaders meeting planning for our worship team retreat that I don't think is necessary. Ah well, I can't really take it out on anyone except for my blog readers so there you go....

I think I might actually go and do some work....oh how my friday nights have changed, or rather not improved at all...

Oooooo!!! Star Wars "colon" Episode III

How I love those colon films (Pirates of the Carribean: The Curse of the Black Pearl, The Lord of the Rings: The fellowship of the ring etc): seriously excited though, now only to find someone who is equally excited and will not go "ewww so your like, one of them star wars freaks" like I had today.... stupid ditzy non-science fiction/action loving girlies-if anyone is so inclined, i would be appreciative to learn that I was not the only person who found solace in the fictional world of George Lucas....please???

Well, if not then i guess i will be redecorating my room mucho fast before anyone happens upon it.

So many people....

It is interesting to count how many people walk down Queens Street every minute. In the time that it took me to walk from the bottom of Queen Street to Real Groovy I passed over 500 people. (I stopped counting at 500 anyway) Even with this large number of people, I saw no-one that I knew or recognised, or even faintly believed I had walked past a couple of days ago. In such a large group of people, there was not one person I could have talked to and yet I am sure that many of these people were wonderful friendly loving individuals. I suddenly felt very alone in the world as I thought this walking into Real Groovy. Could there be anything worse than feeling completely alone in a world where you were surrounded by so many people?

“Ain’ the stars perty t’naht?”

It must be lonely, out in space. Even with its millions of galaxies and billions of stars, there is a darkness that invades it. The stars themselves can’t understand this darkness, for their glorious light pierces it, nullifies it. They cannot know, for they cannot see, that darkness eludes them - yet it is their own light that stops them from seeing. It must be lonely there, in that darkness. It sees the light of the stars and yet sadly, cannot draw near.

In my darkness, you are the light
In my desperation, you are my comforter
In my loneliness, you are my friend
In my heart, you are Lord of my life

Youth Band rocks

Today was a pretty good day. I had to take the youth band by myself because of Tash's prior engagement with Luke's wedding. I'm mucho impressed at how well the adapt and can learn to do the new stuff you ask them to. The greatest thing is that I don't really have to do much, just tell them what to play and then make comments about how they might think about doing it differently. The one annoyance I sustained was that I had to mix the sound myself because Mitch was at a 'moot.' Thats the second time in the last month that I have heard the term moot (when not referring to a meeting of Ents) and I am surprised that it is new terminology for me altogether. Ah the english language and its endless ability to surprise and entertain me.

Anyhoo, being an absolute shocker of a sound guy, (seeing as I have learnt by twiddling somw knobs on the desk) the sound itself wasnt that great. And missing a bass guitarist did not help the overall sound. However it is the little improvements that impress me the most: getting the interlude sound right, beginning to communicate with each other, showing contrast in the different parts of the song. All of these things contribute to making good music and a flippin good team.

I also can't wait to hear Tash's commentary on the wedding. She is somewhat infamous for it. And seeing as though the preparation for the wedding was in someplaces a little...unusual I think there will be plenty of stuff to chat about...

Prayer

Today was centered around the topic of prayer for me. It has been a subject that I have been tossing around in my head for quite some time. What is prayer really all about? I mean, I know what prayer does, i think i know what prayer consists of (that is the action part) but what does it all mean to me, my soul and my life.

Is prayer only an event that begins with a "Dear God" etc or can it be somthing continuous - a life that breathes prayer to God. I think that is what I want prayer to be for me. Prayer should be a constant searching for God's will in every situation with the end result that God's will for my life becomes my will. I want the desires of my heart to be the desires that God has for me.

In saying that, prayer should still involve time set aside to focus of the areas of my life or others lives that need specific prayer or that concern me. It is inevitable the the will of God is not always going to strike the exact direction that I want to take so it is vital that I dialogue with God or commune with him to understand those faults in the desires of my heart.

One of the things that has been bugging me about the Lords prayer is the way that so many people I have talked to recently have viewed the prayer as the best way that we can pray because that is how Jesus prayed. Firstly, as our senior pastor kindly pointed out on Sunday, Jesus would have never prayed this prayer for him self as the "forgive us our sins" doesn't particuarliy resound with the perception that the bible portrays of Jesus as sin-less. However, the Lord's prayer does provide us with an excellent structure as to how we could pray.

1. Our father who is in heaven hallowed be they name, your kingdom come, your will be done on earth as it is in heaven = pray that gods will work through you and others to do Gods will
2. Give us this day our daily bread, and forgive us our sins as we forgive those who sin against us = pretty literal, pray for forgiveness for the things that you have done wrong (but you will only be forgiven if you forgive others first)
3. Lead us not into temptation, and deliver us from evil = we know that as followers of God, we will be hated by the world (as the world hated Jesus) so we pray that God will protect us and those that do his work on earth from evil and the things in life that tempt us to do wrong.
4. For yours is the kingdom and the power and the glory forever and ever = praise God for his awesome power and for the great things he has done in you life and the lives of others around you.

(NB: this is based on my perception of the bible and is what i currently percieve the lords prayer to mean)

Our church is currently looking at prayer and how it should be reflected in our lives. Tash (who leads a worship band with me) and I got together today to write a version of The Lords Prayer for our congregation. Its interesting the way that God is working through us to create music that can speak (hopefully) directly to the hearts of the youth we serve. I must say I really love working with Tash, I don't know where the words she writes (this was an abstraction of the lords prayer, not a direct transcription) come from, but they seriously rock ass and I know they have to come from God. (No tash i didnt put that there coz i know your gonna read it soon)

The Paradox of the Civil Union

I was just chatting with my mate Mitch today who has come up with the most brilliant loop hole in the Civil Union legislation. He proposes that if he was to get a civil union with his girlfriend (removed from the church) he would hence be able to receive a student allowance as the poor couple trying to make their way in the world instead of being excluded by the government based on the income of his parents. As if your parents after 18 years of raising you could be stuffed paying for any of your university fees...Sheer brilliance on Mitch's part.

The only problem that could cripple the whole plan is the issue of living together....meh! I guess i'll just put that into the section of my brain simply refered to as the "section of the brain which contains paradoxi that conflict with the rational and theology which my life satellites."

Stupid brain still working at half past midnight. GRRRR.

(Hmmm. i wonder what miss pennybrains will mock out of that. I look forward to a good laugh tomorrow night.)

Jonathan Boyd Palmer

Following on from the excellent blog I have just read on Jacob's testimony - funny how quite a few people had no idea what Jakes was going on about...hmm - I thought I should share mine, so that those who read this blog have some idea of who I am and what I am like.

So, I was born in Auckland, New Zealand on the 4th November 1986. Since then I have lived on the North Shore with my parents and my brother. I was nutured in a commited christian home and since I can remember have had the knowledge of God and the presense of Jesus in my life. I was baptised in my heart when I was 13 and physically last August. (2004) My life is centered around the church and my passion for music.

I am a worship leader at Windsor Park Baptist Church and have played keys in the band for 4 years. I am currently studying for a Bachelor of Music and a Bachelor of Arts at Auckland University, double majoring in Performance Voice and Classical Studies. A large majority of my friends are also passionate about music and using music to grow the kingdom of God.

I have found the beginning of this year to contain some of the most difficult struggles of my life. University in itself is a huge step from high school and the pressures of university philosophy and the independance that goes with being at university has put great stress on my relationships with friends and with God. Because school is such an awesome tool to maintain friendships, being at a stage where you really have to work hard to see you friends has meant that I have neglected some of those people who I hold most dear to me. This is my most current struggle and an area that I have to commit to God to fix.

Having said that, one of the greatest things that has helped me in this time of change is directly related to a change in my prayer patterns. Rather than simply praying to God for the things I want, I now pray that God would be able to do his will for me and my life. This has meant that my prayers have always been answered and I am seeing that God is changing the desires of my heart to be the desires of his - this was the most important revelation I had at Easter camp and so far the best this year.

So, there we go...me in a nutshell.

greetings

Sup my brothers and sisters...(ooo how completely out of character)
This is a blog that you may frequent, or may never visit ever again. Although out of context to what was originally said, i was told that it you ever found something that was truly perfect that you should leave it alone and go away because you'd simply taint it. That is a truth that is absolute here. So your visiting here, although it may have been an accident, is perfectly welcome. You were invited before you even knew that this blog existed.

As for the first long while I will be the only person frequenting this place, i will most likely post things that mean something to me and will not include an explaination for you. If an explaination is what you so desire, then please tell me to do so, thus the dialogue can develop from your input.